Yesterday I was jean shopping with my 15 year old son. He is tall and very thin-he resisted going shopping for jeans and he grew so all of his jeans were floods so I ordered jeans online in the size he thought would fit. He tried on 1 of the six pairs I ordered-3 different styles and said none fit:) I can only ask him to try them on so many times-so I said we will have to go to the store exchange them and try on different styles and sizes until we figure out what looks and fits best. He had to go in the fitting room twice each time a different girl helped him and addressed him by his name-the person who met us in the front asked his name and communicated through a mike to the girls in back to give them heads up he was coming. It was nice they were trying to give a personal touch to their service. I could tell my son was done shopping and aggravated. When we left the store he started letting me know he wasn't happy-pretty much the whole way to the car-a good walk, Lenox Mall is large:)
I was thinking what did I do? Why is he so upset? I was trying my hardest to please him and get him what he wanted. I told him to stop I needed to concentrate on driving-in the heart of Atlanta there was allot of traffic and it was dark we had a 45 minute drive home-too bad I couldn't fly home:)
Then he started making small talk I was not happy and trying to figure things out so I was quiet and about to cry-then he nudged me and smiled. He said both girls got his name wrong. He said he hated his name no one says it right. He said many of the teachers in school call him Brandy when they do roll call. I felt so bad-how can I fix this...I do not like my kids unhappy especially if I caused it.
His name is Brandt. I put so much thought into both of my boys names. I wanted them to be unique special and confident-after all they are men. My husband wanted to name him Brian-but I thought that is too ordinary-of course Brandt likes that name better:) My husband says just listen to me I am always right..yeah, yeah , yeah:)
I experienced a lifetime of being a number...there was always several Kim's in my classes so to differentiate us- I would be Kim R. or Kim 1, etc. I thought I don't want my sons to experience that.
To my dismay he hates his name:( I feel huge Mom guilt! I thought about it last night and came up with what my husband did. His name is really William, he experienced what I did. His Grandfather's name is William and his Dad's name is William and my Dad's name was William to name a few:)
So to differentiate who they were talking to he was called Bill Robert, then B.R.-which is what he went by in high school when we met. But for professional reasons and tired of explaining what B.R. meant, in college and from then on he goes by Robert his middle name. The only time he has to explain it is when I am around because I still call him B.R.-because if I call him Robert he won't answer me:) He says it is too weird.
So I suggested this morning to Brandt to go by his middle name or initials...he was thinking about it and I think liked the idea-he seemed a little happier:)
